Create the Map of Your Dreams for 2019

Do you write down your goals and dreams? Do you move towards them? Or you simply prefer to sip your coffee, write your goals in a beautiful golden notebook, listen to countless coaching videos on how to finally make your dreams true and still not move your finger towards your plans?

Last week in Zurich, Switzerland we were learning how to grab the wheel of the ship called ‘life’ and how to fulfil our dreams.

You know the saying “dreams come true”, don’t you? I think it’s trumpery.

You have thousands of life coaches who give you advise on “how to attract things into your life”, but only a few of them really know the missing ingredient of the soup called ‘the life broth’.

Last week in Zurich the Plantation of Creativity organised creative-coaching workshops to uncover the key missing ingredient in our life broth. Using a Feng-Shui method based on Bagua Map, we were learning to spot out true dreams and discover the ways on how to fulfil them. Also, we learned how to avoid the traps of “positive thinking” and setting too many goals for the year.

map-of-dreams-plantation-creativity-skills-coaching-workshop-classes

The majority of the dreams were focused on love and relationships. During the workshops the participants learned the hard truth of what a personal happiness means and the secret ingredient of a happy relationship.

Are you a woman whose dream is to meet a man who will take your sorrows away and be a prince on a horse? If yes, then I have bad news for you. The prince won’t arrive, even on a pony. If you will be sitting, complaining and waiting for a man to ‘save you’ then you didn’t get it right.

The same goes if you’re a man looking for a princess who will brighten up your life, give you a life purpose and finally motivate you to change for better. The fact is, we, princesses like men who are already motivated and don’t need a woman to motivate them and tell them what to do.

If we are not happy with ourselves, we won’t be happy with another person. If we won’t take care of our well-being and of our personal plans and goals and simply wait for the other person to come and fill our life, we will wait forever, like for a bus on a desert, which will never come…

What makes you happy and attractive for the other person is how you live your life. It doesn’t matter if you drive Maserati and spend your weekends in St Moritz or on a beach in Hawaii. What matters is if your Maserati and St Moritz weekends give you joy and make you as happy as Larry. By the way, can you be happy stripped off of your car and luxurious vacation? Sitting in a pyjama, reading a book and looking out the window enjoying the snowfall?

If yes, I congratulate you. You seem to have got it right.

If you enjoy being with yourself, you will enjoy being with the other person. And only then the “Bailando” of love will start to happen… 😉

Don’t spread your pain in installments. Let go of your past.

Take a look at your past. What do you see? Is it the source of your strength and experience or the source of a recurring pain and suffering?

How old are you? Even if you’re still young, you’ve been through some experiences in your life. Some of them were pleasant, wonderful, worth to remember. But there were also the moments which you don’t want to remember, but somehow they come back to the surface of your life like dead fish which emerge at the surface of the water in a river-flow.

Which memories take up the most space in your mind?

Pleasant ones or turbulent ones from your past? Still the same old movie that’s haunting you, trying to revive same old scene, like in a song by Roxy?

How to deal with the negative experiences from your past?
Skiing can be the answer.

What we tend to do with our past experiences is we revive them by thinking about them in our present. We are worried all the time when we meet a new person and we wonder “what if he or she turns out to be like my ex?”. We are afraid of being exposed to pain and suffering, of  losing ourselves again. Because we all are well-aware of how hard it is to find ourselves back on track after a painful fall.

We fail to control the thoughts about our past the way we forget to control our skis when we’re wearing them for the first time.

What we tend to do with our past experiences is we revive them by thinking about them in our present. We are worried all the time when we meet a new person and we wonder “what if he or she turns out to be like my ex?”. We are afraid of being exposed to pain and suffering, of  losing ourselves again. Because we all are well-aware of how hard it is to find ourselves back on track after a painful fall.

We fail to control the thoughts about our past the way we forget to control our skis when we’re wearing them for the first time. 

Have you ever tried cross-country skiing?

When you learn the skating technique it is essential to keep the V shape of your skis to glide and move forward. If you don’t keep the V you either fall or glide backwards. Therefore, as a beginner you need to put all your attention to keeping your V and moving forward. It’s a practice. If you check on YouTube some cross-country skating you’ll find watching it easy and it will appear to you as a relatively easy technique. But it’s only after you put your skis on and practise, you discover it’s a hard work and an enjoyable though painful exercise for your muscles.

The same goes for letting go of your past.

You cannot erase it by clicking ‘delete’ but you can store it in some part of your memory. Instead of accessing these painful memories every day, focus on keeping your skis in your V to move forward. Stay in the present and don’t let your thoughts about the past wander around. Control them the way you control your skis on a slope.

Easier said than done – you’ll say.  Indeed. Letting go of your past requires practise. It is not an in-born ability. The only things which are innate is your tendency to have a prostate cancer, the length of your thighbone or the amount of hair on your head. All the rest is up to you how you deal with it.

It is not enough to sit and tell yourself “dear thoughts about the past, please go away”. They won’t.  The more you think about them, the more influence they will have on your life. The pain will thus be spread in installments, instead of being paid at once. 

Traumatic past experiences are like small stones in your shoes that hurt your feet.

Such stones are past, disappointing relationship, broken hearts, old wounds and inability to forgive. You can cover your hurt feet with plasters with Mickey Mouse but it won’t eliminate the pain.

What you need to do is to deal with the source of the pain – take the stones out of your shoes. They won’t fall out by themselves. 

There’s one good exercise, which can help you to say goodbye to your negative memories of your past. Usually it’s people, who hurt us and produce the negative hurtful emotions. That’s why it’s essential to let go of them peacefully. The technique is called ‘the ship’.

  1. Lie down on your bed, switch off all distractions like mobile phones or computers.
  2. Close your eyes and breathe deeply for 5 minutes.
  3. Imagine you stand on a pier by a beautiful sea. Smell the fresh, salty air, hear the seagulls screams.
  4. Picture a big ship standing by the pier. This ship has everything essential for a very long, infinite journey. It is safe and modern and the person who will board the ship will have everything she or he will ever need.
  5. See a person (the one that hurt you in the past and you want to let go) strolling on the pier, walking to meet you. 
  6. Look at his/her eyes and thank him/her for everything you have experienced together and say to him/her that you are going to let them go on a beautiful infinite journey, away from your life.
  7. In this moment you may cry. Allow yourself for the tears and all the emotions. Feel them and let them be. Take the pain out. Say “thank you” again.
  8. Observe the person boarding the ship. 
  9. Then, release the anchor and watch the ship until it disappears over the horizon.
  10. Now, take a deep breath, smell the see and look forward to the horizon when new things and people will soon come to you.
  11. Take a deep breath and open your eyes. Welcome again 🙂 

You have released your past and you have sent the person who was producing the negative thoughts on an infinite journey. You let go and made space for new things to come. Well done!

We’re like pawns on the eternal board, who are never quite sure what they’ve moved towards. But it’s far better to have an unsure future than to live in the same old scene that’s been haunting us.

Let go of your past and get rid of the burden which prevents you from creating a happy future. Focus on keeping your V and moving forward. Take a ski lesson.

Enjoy your practice!

Plantation of Creativity Team

Do you judge people by their looks? Three reasons you should.

“Don’t judge a book by its cover”. This saying is quite well ingrained in our brain. However, we do exactly the opposite, as we are steered by our biology. We judge men who pass us by on the street, we judge if the pineapple is ripe enough by looking at its colour and skin. Every day we analyse thousands of things, which lighten up our brain just like the lightening on the stormy sky. But with one small exception – we hear no thunder. 

When you see a woman the first thing you do is you analyse (yes, big thanks to our subconscious brain) her looks and physical potential.

That’s how our ancestors (the cave men) where judging if a woman was able to give them healthy offspring. We, women, also judge men. Though physical looks is a little less important for us. What matters for women is whether the man they choose is able to protect them and their children. To take care of them. To be the real man who is not afraid of taking decisions.

We can cheat ourselves, but we cannot cheat biology.

1. WHEN YOU JUDGE LOOKS – YOU JUDGE CHARACTER

Physical appearance is important. It’s something more than just a neat face and a nice ass. Good looks is character, because nice asses and faces do not fall from the sky, nor they are given by a magic long-haired fairy.

The truth is that to look good you need to put some effort into it. A beautiful body, sexy ass and slim belly are not genetically passed on. At least, not in 80% of the cases. You simply need to work for it and this is the place where your character comes in and opens the doors. Will you have enough stamina and motivation to go through?

Marc was recently training a girl who was working in banking at Paradeplatz. He noticed that after the training she ate a bowl of a healthy salad, immediately followed by three chocolate bars. He saw it and simply uttered: “Once you pop, you can’t stop. Life is a no dolce vita baby. Either you go for the schoggi bars and cheat yourself that “you wanna be beautiful” or you get down to a plank and work these bars off“.

Character is the key to your looks.

2. IN HEALTHY BODY HEALTHY SPIRIT

Let’s discuss another example. This time of Maria, a good-looking woman in her forties working for a cryptocurrency company. “How would I feel arriving at work knowing I didn’t shower, didn’t eat my healthy breakfast and put the clothes I really dislike? Awful. I do it for myself to stay healthy and also to the people I love like my husband and daughter. Well, everybody enjoys being in the company of a good-looking and well cared-for women. Here in Switzerland, we call it “gut gepflegt”. We once were looking for office assistant and the manager employed one woman. On her first day she came to the office and she looked like taken straight from bed. Hair flying in all directions, no make up, no neat clothing. When I see such people I know they don’t take good care of themselves. Maybe lack of self-love is the issue…

A healthy and good-looking body is a sign of your good mental health. If you’re a couch potato everybody will be able to see it without having asked you. Your body and your attitude to it will show it.

3. SELF-LOVE AS A TOOL ENABLING LOVING OTHER PEOPLE

Have you ever wondered why you have your body? It serves you so well, it keeps you moving, it digests all the fast things which you sometimes feed it. Yet you fail to look after it. Your avatar is the cosmic suit for your soul. The way you look and the way you treat it shows how much you love yourself.

Yes, loving yourself. Do you remember the biblical commandment “Love your neighbour like yourself“? Hm. Loving yourself was put on the 1st position. Only then, you can love other people.

Taking care of your body and looks is an act of self-love. Stop for a moment and think: how much time per day you think about other people and how to please them? Then, compare how much time you devote to taking care of yourself. What was the last time you went to the SPA or to the gym?

The hard truth is that you don’t look like the best version of yourself, because you don’t love and accept yourself. If you did, you would know that you are a unicorn, not a sheep, and you deserve to be treated like one.

Heads up unicorns! Look in the mirror and say to yourself: “Yes, I am a unicorn. And I love myself”.

First step done. Congratulations! Now it’s time to hit the gym and burn the chocolate bars of the cage circling your looks.

Plantation of Creativity Team

How to exercise at home? The power of habit.

“I tried to exercise at home, but after the first push-up I couldn’t move up from the floor…” How many of you experience the feeling of helplessness when you finally decide to exercise?

Perhaps you will say: “I have kids, a full time job and a husband”. Yes. The famous excuse of us all. Even some of us who are healthy singles in their thirties are “too busy” to find time to exercise at home or to go to the gym…

Instead, you start your morning with a ‘schoggi gipfel’ (Swiss name for a chocolate croissant) and a bucket of coffee. Personally, I have nothing against gipfels, but a gipfel a day will certainly not keep the doctor away.

You know it so well. Do sport, eat healthy, meditate, think positive…. Yeah. But when? When is always the question, which is left with no good answer.

HOW TO START WHEN YOU’RE BUSY AS A BEE?

1. Write how your typical day looks like on paper.

Usually, the biggest part of our days takes our job. Write down your daily activities and you’ll see that you’ll find a 45 minutes window of time, even when you thought that it was impossible. How about making time at lunch break for the gym?

Example: 6:45 a.m. – wake up time, 8:30-18:00 work, 19:00 shopping/cooking/meeting friends/family time/watching TV/sitting on facebook etc.

Cut on some unproductive activities like sitting on facebook and hit the gym instead. Wake up one hour earlier and do some yoga at home. You don’t even need a yoga mat. Bare floor is really enough.

2. Write your goal.

“I wanna be more fit”  – it is too general. Why don’t you make it more concrete? “I want to lose 5 kg”, “I want to fit in size 38” , “I wanna be able to chase my children on the playground with no panting”  – they all sound better. Why? Because they are measurable. You can measure how many kg you lose and how many cm disappear from you belly. You measure the progress of your exercise. And this motivates you even more.

3. Install a new habit.

You wanna burn the fat that you have cultured like your own crop, right? Now the time has come to saw. Then you will reap. But before you explode with happiness with your new body, some dirty work is waiting to be done. Don’t deceive yourself that it will be easy. No. It will be very difficult. It all comes down to installing a new habit and simply going for it. Regularly.

GYM OR HOME?

Whether you decide to exercise in a gym or at home, it doesn’t matter as soon as you do the work. Wind up your sleeves and prepare for a hard work in the field. Imagine you’re a farmer and the field is your body.  Have you ever imagined what immense work does the farmer do from the moment he plants his crops until he harvests it?

INSTALLING A NEW HABIT

Are you acquainted with the theory of Pavlov’s dog? In short, this is a theory of classical conditioning. A certain stimulus can produce a response. We won’t get too much into details. What is important is that you can create your own theory of conditioning and adapt it for your fitness goals.

Imagine you want to instal a habit of exercising 30 minutes at home every day or going to the gym 3 times a week. How to motivate yourself? Sometimes images of slim and sporty body are not enough to keep you going. Then, you can introduce a stimulus. Just like Ivan Pavlov made it with the dog.

Think about something which could be a reward for sticking to your exercise plan and executing it. This can be eating your favourite dish or even a croissant. The thing is to treat it as something special to keep up your motivation. So no 3 croissants per day or no pizza after workout. But a home-made pizza once a week? Why not?

Last but not least, don’t push it too hard and remember to love yourself the way you are. Exercising is taking care of your body. That’s how you show your love to it.

Make progress. Not excuses. Make the time for your precious body, which is you. Get fit for life, not just for summer. Your “Pavlov’s dog” is definitely going to help you. No eat up without a sit up 🙂

Wishing you success in installing your new habits!

Plantation of Creativity Team